31 Days of Draughts
and Darkness: Volume IV
Turbo Kid (2015)
Turbo Kid isn't a true
horror film, rather more of an post-apocalyptic action-epic. But that sure
doesn't stop it from being one of the most gleefully gory yet somehow
heartwarming adventures I've ever seen. A true indie darling, "Turbo
Kid" is a love-letter to 80's cheese, awash in the sort of pop-culture
high fructose corn syrup my entire generation was raised on.
And let's face it,
though devoid of horror trappings, "Turbo Kid" packs more bloodshed
and splatter than most cherished slasher movies. That it does so with such
downright warmth is what makes it so enjoyable.
The Plot: We begin our
story with an ominous narrator setting the scene: The world is a charred
husk of its former self, an irradiated wasteland where water is scare and the
source of Armageddon cryptic.
The dark, new world of...1997.
God, we're only thirty-seconds in
and I already love this movie.
We meet 'The Kid', never given a
formal name, but hardly in need of one. He's our scrappy protagonist, surviving
the perils of the toxic wasteland with gusto despite his age. The Kid spends
his days scavenging for supplies to sell at the local flea market in exchange
for water, now a seriously-valuable commodity. But despite his hellish
surroundings and a rather tragic back-story, revealed in tidbits, the Kid's able
to make a decent life for himself amidst the ruin. He even has his own private
bunker packed with nostalgic lore. Floor-to-ceiling Rubik cubes and comics.
The Kid's life takes a serious
curve when he meets the adorable Apple, a lovely gal who's rather aggressive
with her definition of friendship. Basically, if she picks you as a buddy,
you're buddies, and that's it. Get used to it. And the bracelet-bound tracking
device she'll affix to your wrist.
When the Kid asks how to remove
it, she happily replies "Oh, you just don't."
Sound creepy? It is. At first. But
I can guarantee Apple will win you over after 20 minutes. Apple and the Kid are
about to embark on the sort of adventure that would've made for an
instant-classic had it come out in the 80's.
The Flavor: When walking into "Turbo Kid",
I expected the following: numerous nods to 80's and 90's-era pop culture,
practical effects-driven gore, and a relatively zany sense of self-awareness.
Was all that included? Most certainly. But it came with so much more.
"Turbo Kid" comes across like an old-school 80's
adventure, right in the realm of 'Goonies', but cranks up the cheese-factor and violence to 110%. The silliness that pervades this film strikes all the hallmarks
of a loving parody: delightfully skewering the more outlandish trappings of a
genre while simultaneously adoring it because of them. The filmmakers are
utterly in love with their source material. And it shows.
Throughout the story, we see our hero start off as a nobody
and ascend to the level of downright-superhero. Naturally, with the help of
some quirky friends and sidekicks.
And standing in their way is a delightful Michael Ironside,
having the time of his life as the despotic villain Zeus, the self-proclaimed
ruler of the wasteland. Much of the splattery carnage that ensues comes from
the remnants of his henchmen, more expendable than a fleet Star Trek red-shirts.
The shown-downs between our heroes and the bad guys swim in an ocean of practical effects. Fake blood and entrails dance across the screen at times. But
even for the squeamish, the tone is so silly it's as if you were watching a
living cartoon. You'll scream, then laugh.
Most surprising was the level of utter heart imbued into the
film. For such a goofy tone, you truly grow to care about the characters, many
of which aren't even given formal names. The cast completely sells the
adventure, despite its inherent sense of wackiness.
Best Paired With:
Oddly, for such a down-right violent film, I still want to
recommend "Turbo Kid" as a family-friendly Halloween movie. I'd keep
the younger kids away, but the tone is so over-the-top, so obviously fake in
appearance and lacking in malice, that isn't nearly impossible to be disturbed.
Violence-aside, "Turbo Kid" is a fun and energetic
adventure, the sort of movie that's difficult not to like. The characters are
universally fun and committed to the ride. And anyone who grew up in the
time-period to which the film pays tribute will be smiling ear-to-ear at all
the references.
Brew:
After three years (!) of reviewing seasonal ales and lagers,
it's time to start revisiting some old favorites. I'll add in new stuff
here-and-there, but I've already covered so many seasonal offerings, we're
gonna have to look to the past.
I had originally thought "Turbo Kid" would pair
best with a lighter, sweeter pumpkin ale. But after being surprised by some of
the film's more emotional punches, I changed my mind to something with a bit
more weight. Here's one of my favorite pumpkin beers.
Name: Roadsmary's Baby
Brewery: Two Roads
Where Brewed: Stratford, CT
ABV: 6.8%
Style: Pumpkin Ale, aged in Rum Barrels
Color: A
slightly-hazy nut brown shade, like a mix of orange and ruby colors.
Amora: The entire array of Fall spices are there. With them
are a mix of sweetness, dry pumpkin flavor
Taste: Starts out much like a typical pumpkin ale. The
spices wash over the tongue and are one of the first things you taste. They're
strong in flavor, as can be expected, but not overly expressed. The beer isn't
sweet, so the spices don't go into cloying or syrupy territory. As the spice
flavor settles, a nice dry pumpkin flavor arrives. If you're a pumpkin fan,
you'll be happy, as this pumpkin flavor is fairly robust and comes through well
even among the spices.
Here's where it gets interesting. The spices and pumpkin are
par for the Halloween-course, but along with them comes the sharp,
slightly-sweet sting of higher alcohol. This sweetness has a bit more body to
it, coating the mouth moreso. It's the rum, my friends. If you're a spiced rum
fan, this brew's the perfect seasonal treat. Because many of the spices used to
rum are already present, both the pumpkin and rum go very well together. Plus,
the sweetness is restrained enough to keep the beer tasty, complex (the rum
notes are faint but there), and interesting.
Aftertaste: After you swallow, the spice and pumpkin
character stick around for quite a bit. It's also at this time that some of the
boozier qualities of the rum come out moreso. I'd almost venture to say the rum
is more pronounced at the end of a sip than at its beginning or mid-point. The
hop profile is hard to peg, as there are so many other flavors. It's there, but
very subtle.
Body: The brew shares the light-to-medium body of most other
pumpkin ales, but it's weight is upped by the higher ABV and rum, which give it
a distinct 'mouth-coating' quality usually shared by, unsurprisingly, higher ABV brews and hard liquors. It
certainly helps spread the flavor around the mouth, and there's a lot of
flavors to distribute.
Pair: With the season, itself. This is fantastic and would
go equally well with pizza/wing night as it would roast pork or chicken.
